{"id":1653,"date":"2014-04-22T22:10:17","date_gmt":"2014-04-23T02:10:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/?p=1653"},"modified":"2014-06-19T23:20:49","modified_gmt":"2014-06-20T03:20:49","slug":"april-funnies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/april-funnies\/","title":{"rendered":"April Funnies"},"content":{"rendered":"

Mom was making garnachies at our house and Adam watched her shake salt into the beans without measuring.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re a professional.\u00a0 You just season to taste.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Liam while doing his schoolwork: \u201cThis one is unconscious.\u00a0 My \u2018e\u2019s\u2019 don\u2019t usually look like that.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I made these outrageously good granola bars<\/a>.\u00a0 Shockingly, they\u2019re also outrageously healthy.\u00a0 Adam tasted one and said, \u201cDid you put nicotine in these?\u201d\u00a0 I must not be the only one who thinks they\u2019re addictive.<\/p>\n

\"Apr14_0056\"<\/a><\/p>\n

The boys were supposed to bring a wheelbarrow load of wood into the basement for the wood furnace.\u00a0 The wood was under a tarp and, without thinking about the consequences, Adam would throw the wood to the edge and Liam would take it to the wheelbarrow.\u00a0 The inevitable happened.\u00a0 Liam got hit.\u00a0 Adam brought him to the door.\u00a0 I could hear his wailing the entire time they traipsed through the yard.\u00a0 When Adam finished telling me the story I looked at Liam and the enormous crocodile tears and the tell-tale mouth hanging open (usually means I\u2019m not really hurt badly but I am in desperate need of attention so I\u2019ll milk this for all it\u2019s worth).<\/p>\n

Me: \u201cAdam, did you apologize?\u201d<\/p>\n

Adam: \u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n

Me: \u201cLiam, did you say, I forgive you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Liam: \u201cNo, I was too busy crying.\u201d<\/p>\n

And just like that it was all over and they tromped back to the woodpile a little wiser.<\/p>\n

\"Apr<\/a>\u00a0{first tick bite of the season . they didn’t even wait until it got warm}<\/p>\n

Liam was setting the table when Mom was here.\u00a0 \u201cHey, Grammie, I \u2018setted\u2019 you between my mom and dad.\u201d\u00a0 We grinned at each other and turned to look.\u00a0 He wasn\u2019t kidding.\u00a0 The table that normally seats four had five plates on it.\u00a0 Four in their normal positions and the fifth plate squeezed tightly between where David and I sit. \u00a0\ud83d\ude42<\/p>\n

\"Apr<\/a><\/p>\n

Mom bought shrimp for our supper one night while she was here.\u00a0 This is a huge, huge treat for our family and they get carefully divided so everyone gets the same amount.\u00a0 We were all enjoying them when Adam randomly announced, \u201cGood thing these are invertebrates.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Another day while we were studying health I was reading over the jokes they had interspersed.\u00a0 Adam listened obligingly then said, \u201cThese just don\u2019t hit my funny bone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Apr<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\"Apr<\/a><\/p>\n

Liam\u2019s newest vocabulary word is fair.\u00a0 As in, \u201cshe slept a fair amount,\u201d or, \u201cThere is a fair amount of paint left.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Adam has been steadily making up jokes.\u00a0 His most famous ones are what he calls the toothpaste jokes.<\/p>\n

Q: What\u2019s a hunter\u2019s favorite kind of toothpaste? A: Aim<\/p>\n

Q: What\u2019s a surfer\u2019s favorite kind of toothpaste? A: Crest<\/p>\n

Q: What\u2019s a carpenter\u2019s favorite kind of toothpaste? A: Arm and Hammer<\/p>\n

Q: What\u2019s a farmer\u2019s least favorite kind of toothpaste? A: \u201cCold Gate\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Apr<\/a><\/p>\n

At dinner one night Adam said if someone would tell him he could have one wish he would wish for all the wishes in the world because then he could wish for whatever he wants and he\u2019d get it.\u00a0 David\u00a0 responded with the obligatory parental coaching.\u00a0 \u201cWell, you know you still wouldn\u2019t be happy even if you got everything in the world you can wish for\u2026..\u201d Adam interrupted him.\u00a0 \u201cWell, then I\u2019d just wish for happiness.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Apr<\/a><\/p>\n

The boys do so well with Zara and she loves them to bits.\u00a0 Some days I still crack up at how differently they respond to her than a typical girl would.\u00a0 One day I had Adam take care of her for a bit while I was doing something else.\u00a0 I walked back out to the living room to see him holding her horizontally out in front of him while he slowly made circles and \u201cchop chop chop\u201d noises.\u00a0 Welcome to the world of helicopters and trucks, little girl.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mom was making garnachies at our house and Adam watched her shake salt into the beans without measuring.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re a professional.\u00a0 You just season to taste.\u201d   Liam while doing… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4,6,5,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1653","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adam","category-boy-quotes","category-liam","category-life"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p39ynQ-qF","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1653","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1653"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1653\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1673,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1653\/revisions\/1673"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1653"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1653"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1653"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}