Christy<\/a> posted on one of my pet subjects and it really started my brain (which is amazing considering it’s not 10:00 yet). She talked about hiding our real self and why we do it. For several years now, ok, ever since I got married and moved here almost five years ago, I’ve been trying to determine several things. One, how do you find people you “mesh” well with in a new community? I think I have two, maybe three, people now whom I feel completely safe with and one of them is about 1,000 miles North for now. The other person moved here two years ago. My husband and I are not one bit convinced we’re going to live here the rest of our lives and frankly, I am scared to smitherines of moving. All because I hate thinking of starting over. I have a number of “social friends” here. I enjoy talking with all the ladies in general. Most of the time, I don’t feel like an outcast anymore. But it took a long time and a lot of hard work to get to this point and I dread the thought of doing it again. <\/p>\nWhen I think about why I hide, the main reason that comes to my mind is because of the other person’s response (or to be more specific, their lack of it). Which leads me to question whether we all want the same response. My close friends, old and new, listen, empathise, share their own journey as it relates, ask questions that let me talk. I really like that. So I assume everyone does. But do they really? Most of the time, I hide. Because every time I let my guards down and say how I feel, I don’t find that. For example, one day, about a month ago, I was so terribly discouraged about the house b\/c we’d just gotten another serious set-back to our moving date. The next day was our church sewing and I decided tomorrow I am not putting on the happy front I’ve tried hard to maintain for months. If someone asks, I’m going to say the truth. I did. And got the same frustrating pat replies like, “oh at least it will be warm when you move (w\/ a smile and a slap on my arm). Just remember it will all be worth it.” Not one, “Oh, I remember that feeling” or “That must be so frustrating.” By the time I got home I was more depressed than ever. And this was about our house. Is it any wonder that I don’t share something personal? But now I’m wondering. If that’s what I’m getting from people, is that what they WANT in return? Am I the odd ball culturally (well that’s sort of obvious) and just need to toughen up? Do some people consider those sorts of statements encouraging and go away feeling revved up to go? I’m not being cynical. I’m questioning. Because I’m beginning to wonder if I need to change my way of thinking and doing and being for the community I’m in. <\/p>\n
Pneumonia<\/u><\/p>\n
Adam has been very sick over the weekend and I finally decided to take him to the doctor Monday when his fever continued to stay at 101.3 whenever it wasn’t masked w\/ motrin. He was diagnosed with pneumonia. Poor kid. He coughs and coughs and coughs and coughs, sometimes until he throws up. At least he’s eating and feeling better since he’s on amoxicillen. Last night when David Lee got home he barreled out the back door like usual and stood on the little stoop. “Hi,” he yelled. “Hi,” David Lee said, “are you feeling better?” “Yes, I am,” Adam said then thought a little before adding, “I’m SO much better. I just don’t have ‘monia anymore.” I knew he was better yesterday morning when he was determined to load the washer by himself. I was standing there holding the door and he refused to load anything for fear I’d grab a piece as soon as he took his eyes off me. Finally he said, “You should not hang on the door. You might ‘scwatch’ it.” I took the hint and left and he loaded the washer in peace.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Xanga Lock I have bashed xanga lock; but for now I’m subscribing. I’m still not convinced this is the “safe” way to go, especially after reading a few things yesterday;… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-828","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p39ynQ-dm","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/828","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=828"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/828\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=828"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=828"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.michellebeachy.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=828"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}